Wow, April. What a month of fire and grand transformation. I have never felt such a passionate shift of energy than that of April. It’s always this month that feels like you have to go through something, some foundational event or learn a big lesson and hopefully come out stronger on the other side.
Let’s review the month.
The first week felt like I was gearing up for war. Slowly at first, and then all at once. I’ve become SO self aware, that I felt it internally, like I knew I needed to mentally prepare myself for what was coming. The moments of uncertainty. I knew the amount of travel I had planned in the coming weeks. Work was going crazy, I would be out of the comfort of my own little world for a while, and there would be so many moving parts, pieces and variables that would be out of my control. I had to surrender honestly. As always, I’d try my best, but at the end of the day, the day has to end. Whatever happens, happens.
And then my aunt died. I feel like over the last two years, there have been more deaths of older members of my family, and it’s a jarring experience. Time is moving. Everything feels sped up almost? Everyone’s getting older. I’m getting older, my parents are getting older, my grandparents are getting older. So I have to find these moments to cherish with them. Including tangible components. A voice note, a photo. Tangible memories. Something to freeze a little moment in time, so you’ll have that little memory to look back on in the future. I think the hardest part of the week of her funeral was being in her home in Jacksonville, happy to be amongst friends and family, but finding myself looking around for her, and then remembering why I was there.
Death is weird.
Work was simultaneously continuing to ramp up. I had a really big presentation during the second week of the month, during team up week, and I was prepping and handling things for my team with shifts of schedules. We were starting the dirty work of a new project we’d been working on for so long. But amongst the chaos and high energy of being in the office, in the flesh, I felt really confident in myself. Like everything was going to be fine. It was a big moment of really trusting myself. I’ve always trusted myself, but this was a moment where I wasn’t uncertain about really anything at all, and I felt like I was exactly where I needed to be. This week was the work Olympics I’d been training for. The war I was gearing up for. And everything worked out just as it was supposed to.
This was also the week of the solar eclipse and I was in Ohio to see like 90% totality. I even shared a vulnerable moment of truth with the entire Creative Marketing department for the Abercrombie brand and that was really scary! but freeing at the same time.
The third week. The event list continues. Mama had surgery on her hand. She’s better now. Then we drove! to Texas. Stopped in NOLA for a while as a lil pit stop. I was actively working on the road, in full on production mode; a time period of work where I am usually heads down, locked in, on DND, committed to my work and tethered to my iMac. But still, no matter the location, we get shit done around here.
I’m back in Charlotte now. Still grinding through in the late stages of the dirty work for the project, but balancing everything as best as I can. It’s all you really can do. I’m grateful for all of the travel over the last month, but also very grateful for foundation and routine again.
According to numerology, (I’m very passionate about these numbers) 2024 is a year 4 for me, and everything a year four represents has really popped off and checked out already. And it’s only the fourth month. 33% of the year. It’s all in the numbers, and everything happens just as it is supposed to.
Let’s explore the senses.
Hear
BFB Da Packman, Chief Keef, Ginuwine, and Gregorian Chants
I don’t understand why these artists are all I want to hear right now. I can’t describe it or make sense of it, or even condone it, but my On Repeat playlist this month consists of BFB Da Packman, Chief Keef, Ginuwine, and Gregorian Chants. A weird combination, but all essential.
Kentucky Love and Faneto were on repeat in my head the days leading up to my promotion at work. I often wonder if an instrumental version of Only When Ur Lonely would hold the same weight and impact for me as the original. Ginuwine is like the Brent Faiyaz of the 90s to me. I can’t explain that. Gregorian chants make everything calm for me when I need to focus.
A respective dichotomy of genres.
Taste
Honey Cheese Mochi Pancakes, Texas Barbecue, and Ohio based restaurants
I’m obsessed with the honey cheese mochi pancakes from Tous Les Jours. They’re fluffy and incredible. Paired with a matcha? 10/10.
Texas Barbecue is cool. Just cool though. Everyone’s always like, “omg the best bbq is in Texas, or North Carolina.” I’m not even a huge fan of barbecue but I guarantee I’d prefer somebody’s uncles’ bbq (in Florida!) over any of those restaurants in TX or NC. The brisket at Terry Black’s Barbecue was pretty good though. Brisket is king.
Ohio based restaurants aren’t even super spectacular, but I love visiting them when I’m in the city. Brassica? The chicken bowl with babganoush is divine. Town Hall? Sensational. THE BONE BROTH? INCREDIBLE. THE THAI PEANUT BOWL? INCREDIBLE. THE KOREAN BBQ FLATBREAD? INCREDIBLE. They played Frank Ocean both times I was in there. The ingredients are clean. Non-GMO. It’s also not crazy expensive. I love Town Hall.
Sight
Watching: Beef via Netflix
Every time I’m away, traveling for work, I like to start a new series, so I have something to watch in my downtime before bed, and I can go at my own pace. I started Beef, almost a year exactly after the show’s debut, and I loved it. Each episode gets crazier and crazier.
Reading: The Creative Act: A Way of Being
It’s a thicker book for me, and I’m about 60% through it. I’m annotating as I read. It has really nice, fresh perspectives of things. Like everything dude is saying makes absolute sense to me. In life though, I don’t understand how people find it so difficult to follow a different perspective, even if things are more efficient with said different perspective. Is that me not understanding their perspective? Idk. It just doesn’t make much sense to me, but that’s apart of the process, I guess.
Smell
Lavender Essential Oil
Since grad school, I’ve carried a tiny vial of lavender on me at all times. It’s a constant for me, and apart of a weird therapy I’ve implemented for myself to help with my (now better) anxiety. It’s nice to dab a bit on my wrists before a meditation, or on my pillow before laying down for bed. Lavender is that girl. So simple, yet so effective.
Touch
MY OURA RING
I finally got it. I’d been looking at OURA rings for like a solid year at this point. I had this internal debate about it for so long, and ultimately decided to just get it. It’s been a year, and I was still thinking about it, so obviously it was important to me. I love it so far. It’s been about a week, and while I’ve really only scratched the surface of the things I’m learning about myself with tangible numbers and statistics, I’m excited to dig deeper, especially with understanding my stress levels.
All in all, April was the most tangible, transformative month for me this year. An amalgamation of hard work being recognized and confidence solidified within the self. As we enter the second third of the year, it’ll be interesting to see how things continue to play out, in every scale of life of our existence - the littlest moments to the most profound of events.
How was April for you? Did you feel the energy shift with the transformation of the new year and start of the Spring Equinox? I’d love to hear about it.
Let’s stay connected.
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